FRIEND’S INFATUATION

Hands on her hips she tested me, “Don’t tell me you didn’t know he was watching you.”

“No,” I replied, how would I know? It’s not like I walk around room to room with a guide telling me there’s a spy nearby.
“No, No, I really didn’t know.” I shook my head vigorously emphasizing the obvious.

“Oh man girlfriend, don’t ya’ know? It’s like they selling tickets there- say you freaky and all.”

F R E A K Y – YOU GOT ME GIRL THAT’S WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT YOU.

“Wow no, I never suspected anyone of watching me with binoculars from a nearby rooftop – no I suppose it never occurred to me I never assumed that men were hiding lying down on a nearby rooftop to spy on me on the off chance that if they’re there at a particular time when I happen to stroll by naked they lie there waiting with binoculars in a trance like an audience, hmm no I honestly never considered this ... “

“I don’t believe you,” she said.

“OK,” I said “Don’t believe me, it’s still true anyway whether you believe me or not. I don’t care what you say; I don’t need your approval. It’s not like you’re my best friend either and since your boyfriend dumped you; you hang around me all day flirting and smoking pot with my bf . Now you pretend you’re my friend - bring this news that you’re on list of a few people who buy tickets on a nearby rooftop to catch a glimpse of me naked.
If these people are your friends I wonder why you’re here when you already saw what you came for. What do you want?”

“I want you to hang non see through blinds on each window,” she said.

“Oh OK you’re looking out for me, you’re my friend. Why don’t you hang those shades then, I’ll buy them - you hang ‘em.”

“Me, come’on! I don’t know shit about hanging shades.”

“Neither do I missy but I’ll go getta’ hammer and nails and hang a dark blanket. It’s always about money. Either I get a new blanket or shades. Blanket’s cheaper but they got you either way.

Now tell me Patricia, just one last time, did you buy a ticket to see me too? Tell me the truth Ewww, Patricia! Yuk! Why’d you wanna do’dat?”

I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know

Don’t know who knows don’t know anyone who does believe me I don’t understand