Monday, September 05, 2011


“It’s ok.” I said, “I’ve been there too
I understand where you’re coming from.
Just show me the dotted line and
I’ll be ready to sign,
I promise I’ll make no demands
for alimony or child support.
My life’s worth more than you could ever pay.”
The gun trained on my face
I heard the click,
saw him pull the trigger back
Imagine the surprise written in his eyes
when still we stood eye to eye 
bullet jammed in the chamber
My life handed to me on a
platter that day, I understand now
But for the mercy of God 
I’d be dead not only broke
Lucky not to succumb to a bullet that day
I said, “Show me the dotted line 
I know when it’s time give in and sign
Because I’ll never get nothing from you 
except a hard way to go.
You never liked sharing anyway 
so I’m glad to let you know
I’m glad to see you go
I want you to know 
I’m glad you know 
I don’t need you to have my own
I had my own before you were born
no - please don’t interrupt," I continued,
holding up my open palm,
"You misunderstand.
Go with your government job 
and all your big benefits.
It’s ok if you refuse to share.
To care for and love your children,
I swear it’s o.k.
I’ll sign it all away to you
As long as you let me go my own way.
I'll sign that dotted line, 
I swear I will!
I’m not giving in to death yet – 
it’s premature to date.
Please don’t make me 
leave my son motherless
Hand me a pen 
I’m ready, willing, able to bend
I’ll sign on that dotted line
By the grace of God
I absolve you from all future debts
Please let me go
Thank God I’m not dead 
Here I go, pen in my hand 
I’m ready to sign on that dotted line.”
The surprise registered in your lifted brows
as you pulled the trigger
and stared me dead in the eye
no remorse for what you’d planned to do
“An eye for an eye,” you quoted, 
“So bang you’re dead, gone in the wink 
of an eye,” and you winked at me.
On your way out the door,
Certainly I hoped this was the last wink of yours I’ll ever see.
In the blink of an eye, my life is worth more than child support
Gleeful smile, no mercy for the bitch written on your face
A New York City minute changes life
when you saw no bullet had emerged from the chamber
no bullet came clambering through 
no bullet rammed through me
By God’s mercy I still stand here before thee
So let me be me and I’ll allow you to be free of me
Free from responsibility demands you could no longer stand 
You were so cruel to me
Ready to sign on the dotted line as long as you’ll let me live
Yes I’m ready to sing there’s a song in my heart
Glory Hallelujah I'm so glad I survived
I'm so blessed to be alive
money ain’t mean nothing, I’ll give it up to stay alive

I got a song in my heart so glad to be alive