Is The World Going Crazy

 IS THE WORLD GOING CRAZY OR IS IT ME

 

Stop asking so many questions or

I could begin to think you’re a cop

I can’t think up the answers that fast

Are you the prosecution or what

Stop looking into my eyes so deep

Like if you look real hard you’ll see what you wanna see 

Like you can see through me

Crinkling like cellophane my body withers before you

You want answers to your questions or what

What are you trying to see

Is it the I in you

Or the I in I

Please see I’m only trying to bring the situation to fruition

It just takes a little more preparation

Forever searching for direction

It’s making a huge impression on me

How many decisions do I have to make

No, I’m a grown woman I don’t need permission

I don’t care about your trepidation

I’m searching for liberation

Haven’t found it anywhere

It’s not as clear as it used to be

I thought I was so aware

It isn’t always fair either

Too many discussions

Deliberations on the same old themes

Wars & losses, poverty, and gasoline prices

Dresses & designers, writers & artists

Vacations & lives, returning home again

Our time and space is limited,

We’re here on this earth to enjoy life do

What we can, our minds so full of clutter

the glimmer the shimmer outside

draws into the glow

mostly it’s all show

sometimes we can’t see what’s right in front of us

I couldn’t see that book that’s clearly right

there on the bookshelf where you left it before

after we looked and looked;

neither of us could see that book right there on the shelf

right there on the shelf

looked once then twice we saw nothing

Looking through the glass pane window

Should I should go in or wait out here

Alone in the rain of my life

The drops glistening on my skin

Should I join the crowd inside

Watching diamonds in the rough

Watching is never enough

give me a moment or two

I’ma go rearrange the universe

Reinvent The Universe

Need alone downtime 

To survive threatening circumstances

Need to listen to the hurt, hear the cries

Regrets I try to forget, leave behind

I turn a blind eye to the answer

Vow to leave doubt out of the question to my answer

Lies survive, my lips deny my heart

Fear a mishap on the horizon

An angel forsaking our great nation on the verge of denial

Does Gehinnom exist? - Jew’s purgatory

Refuse to accommodate doubts about heaven or hell: 

Gehinnom

Intensification exists no doubt

Fingertips feel my heart beat with passion 

Sensation alive in my drive

Pain sears through my womb 

Pain rips my soul from a concentration camp

Revive a better nation based on the assumption

That they do what they want to and we do what we’re told

Secrets we hold near, they hurt but they stay there 

I deny what we live through

Live outside my head in the grip of a constant illusion 

Hear conversations that never occur

Survive the delusion I live inside my head

Rich imaginings of what was said 

What never was nor will be

Die and I never said what I meant to say to you and now I never will

The pain never stops 

I keep moving my feet to a beat only I hear, 

I try to help someone hear, 

Please hear, but no one hears but my fear

Standing alone in a grim bleak reality, coming and going alone

Solutions flash by and are slashed off by reality as 

I follow the path of Dorothy unafraid of what precedes me, lies in wait 

In a roughened bush burning by the side of an elegant brook 

In a forest of deceit, I wander hearing innocent animals slaughtered 

Cries calling out in my head instead 

Reality frozen in a time frame 

Waiting for a way out of the underflow 

I call to every passerby I see

Please, I beg, a hand please, I beg, don’t hurt me 

I’m only a first-time offender 

I didn’t mean to raise my hand, 

Absolution for the abortion, 

Please stop the pollution, 

I hear the cries of an ancient race of animals now all dead, 

There’s no more of them to kill, only a lab created animal exists 

Please Father, a benediction before I go and leave this universe

Can you give me a calculation of where you think I’ll be?

Father I have sinned, 10 hail Marys and go your way and sin no more 

I promise, Father I have sinned

Afraid there’s another life waiting somewhere to find me 

Explore, seeking to find my way out of mischief into a glance of an inner richer universe

No exsanguination please

Try not to cry and the tears build in my eyes betray me

Water builds but doesn’t flow, yet you see me

I explode into another me - who is she? 

I don’t know 

I didn’t make her 

She is I bubbling beneath the blood 

Warm, ready to burst forth in flames fires 

Burst forth from my mouth like a dragon breathing fire I

Explode into a new me

Once more, a reinvention of whom I want to be